


Floo Powder And A Ford Anglia

by FantasticNumberNine



Series: John Watson and the Chamber of Secrets [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: #john can't even go into a bookshop without making the front page, AU, Crossover, Diagon Alley, Floo Travel, Gen, Getting Lost, Getting rescued, Potterlock, flying car, mentions of whomping willow, not getting expelled
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2014-07-18
Packaged: 2018-02-09 10:38:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1979694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasticNumberNine/pseuds/FantasticNumberNine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boys need to get their new school things, and because John can't even step into a bookshop without making the front page, things don't go as smoothly as they rightly should--though he does meet Mycroft's curious little brother. John and Greg then miss the train and cleverly decided to fly the Lestrade's car to Hogwarts. All's well that ends well, yeah?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Floo Powder And A Ford Anglia

**Author's Note:**

> *disclaimer*
> 
> Anyone who was hanging on to meet this world's Sherlock, know that his presence here is brief, and will likely stay that way for a while yet...

John spent most of his time at the Lestrade's explaining to Mr. Lestrade, to the best of his ability, how everything worked in the muggle world--most notably plugs and the post.

Eventually their Hogwarts letters arrived, along with a missive from Mycroft:

_Dear Gregory and John (I would be surprised if he wasn't with you by now, Gregory,)_

_I do hope that whatever foolhardy plan you concocted worked, and that you were able to retrieve John without bringing harm to anyone involved--asking if you did anything illegal would be far too optimistic, as would be believing John did not leap at the opportunity to join you. And the twins. I will believe in miracles the day those two reprobates graduate._

_John, I sincerely wish that there was something I could do to help you escape your relatives in a more permanent fashion. I fear however, that by the time I have the influence appropriate to do so, you will no longer have need of it. Please do inform me that you are relatively unharmed and well, though perhaps with a different owl as this one's next delivery may well be it's last._

_I've been working on our summer assignments--_

"What! We're on _holiday_!" 

_\--which has been a tedious chore, not helped in the slightest by my younger brother's constant attempts to steal my books; this year may be more of a nightmare than the last, Sherlock has received his own letter of admission, and keeping him safe from your shenanigans is going to be near impossible (if my grades suffer because of your insatiable curiosities, there will be hell to pay)._

_We are going to London next Wednesday to outfit my brother and buy my new books. I do imagine I'll see you there, this letter ought to have arrived with plentiful notice, despite the poor bird._

_Respectfully your friend,_

_Mycroft Holmes_

"Pompous prat; remind me, why are we friends with him?"

Early the next Wednesday, John stared at the green powder in the proffered flowerpot.

"Er, what am I supposed to do with that?" 

"Sorry, I forgot--John's never travelled by Floo powder," Greg said suddenly.

There was a moment of confusion ( _escapators_ ), and worry, before the twins led by example, which was followed by advice that was more worrisome than helpful. Trying to keep all the advice in mind--even the contradicting bits--John took a pinch of Floo powder and walked to the edge of the fire. Taking a deep breath, he tossed in the powder and stepped in behind it, swallowing a large amount of ash as he coughed out his destination.

John had no idea where he'd landed, only that he was alone, dizzy, bruised, and covered in soot. A glance around assured him that he was at least in a wizarding shop, but he doubted very much he'd find anything on his school list in here.

Right. Making his way towards the exit, he just caught sight of the last person he wanted to see heading straight towards the shop he'd stumbled into: Jim Moriarty. John practically flew backwards, spotted a large black cabinet, and flung himself inside, leaving the door open just a crack.

The man with Moriarty could be no one but his father. The same sharp, pale face and identical mad brown eyes. 

"Touch nothing, James."

Moriarty, who'd been reaching for a glass eye, pouted. "You said you were going to buy me a present."

"I said I would buy you a racing broom."

"What's the good of that if I'm not on the house team?" Moriarty sulked. "John Watson got a Nimbus Two Thousand last year, special circumstances and permission from the old coot so he could play for Gryffindor. He's nothing special, it's just because he's _famous_... Famous for having a hideous _scar_ on his forehead..."

Moriarty crouched down to examine a shelf full of skulls.

"... Everyone thinks he's so _smart_ , wonderful _Watson_ with his _scar_ , and his _broomstick_ \--"

It was a relief when the Moriarty's finally left, though John was still left alone on an unknown, not-so-friendly street. Until Hagrid showed up looking for Flesh-Eating Slug Repellent and rescued him and took him along to Diagon Alley (again).

"John! Oh for the love, up here, John."

John looked up to see Mycroft Holmes at the top of the white steps to Gringotts. He practically stalked down to meet him.

"What on earth happened to your clothes--no, never mind. You've travelled by Floo. Good morning, Hagrid... What have you done with Gregory?"

"I came out of the wrong grate, I should probably wait for them--"

"Yer won't have long ter wait," grinned Hagrid.

The highlight of the day was Mr. Lestrade meeting Mr. and Dr. Holmes ("But you're _Muggles_!"), and going off with Mr. Holmes to get drinks at the Leaky Cauldron. 

Mycroft's mum took his brother Sherlock with Mrs. Lestrade, who gave them an hour before they would at Flourish and Blotts, which would easily be the worst part of John's day.

When the boys arrived at Flourish and Blotts, there was a large banner announcing that Gilderoy Lockhart (who had written all but one of their required books for the year) would be inside and signing copies of his autobiography that very day.

"We'll have the opportunity to actually meet him," Mycroft looked very pleased with himself, and Greg gave him a sidelong look.

"This wouldn't be why we were ordered to meet today, would it?"

Mycroft ignored him, marching into the shop with his nose in the air. The effect was ruined entirely by the huge crowd inside, most of them witches near Mrs. Lestrade's age. John and Greg squeezed inside behind Mycroft and found their group a bit further up the line.

Gilderoy Lockhart came slowly into view, seated at a table surrounded by pictures of his own face, all winking and flashing dazzlingly white teeth at the crowd. The real Lockhart was wearing robes of forget-me-not blue which exactly matched his eyes; his pointy wizard's hat was set at a jaunty angle on his wavy hair. 

An irritable photographer stepped on Greg's foot, snarled at him, and Greg snapped right back, drawing Lockhart's attention to them. To John.

"It _can't_ be John Watson?"

John was dragged to the front, and suffered through so many photographs with Lockhart he could no longer feel his fingers that the man had been crushing. And _then_ , to find out that the man would be his _teacher_ at Hogwarts! He was feeling particularly thunderous, so much so that Greg didn't say a word when John shoved his free books into his arms, saying shortly that he'd buy his own set-- _unsigned_ , thank you very much--

" _Famous_ John Watson, can't even go into a _bookshop_ without making the front page," Moriarty sneered.

"Leave him alone, obviously he didn't want any of that." Sherlock almost drawled--John hadn't realized he was standing nearby, but was amused by his unnecessary defense; he had attempted to mimic his big brother's drawl, but fallen just short.

The sneer transformed into a bright smirk. 

"Watson, you've got yourself a little _boyfriend_!"

Sherlock blinked, confused by the turn, and Greg spoke up. Which nearly turned into a fight, but Mr. Lestrade stepped in and Mr. Moriarty arrived. 

"Well, well, well--Arthur Lestrade."

"Lucius."

"Busy time at the Ministry, I hear. All those raids... I do hope they're paying you overtime?"

Mr. Moriarty grabbed the topmost book from Greg's pile, a tattered copy of _The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 2_.

"Obviously not. Dear me, what's the use of being a disgrace to the name of wizard if they don't even pay you well for it?"

The fight that followed was broken up by the reappearing Hagrid. Mr. Lestrade had a cut lip, and Mr. Moriarty had the start of a black eye where the _Encyclopedia of Toadstools_ had hit him. He was still holding Greg's secondhand book, and he thrust it at him, his eyes glittering with malice.

"Here, boy--take your book--it's the best your father can give you."

As everyone prepared to part ways, Mycroft stopped them: "Sherlock, return Gregory's schoolbook."

"I was just looking..."

"I have exactly the same book, steal it when I've finished."

There was a bit of skulking, but Sherlock returned _The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 2_ , and Greg blinked a bit at Mycroft, because Mycroft owned exactly nothing that had been bought tattered and secondhand. 

The end of the summer holidays came too quickly for John--who was staring, bewildered, at the gateway to Platform 9 3/4 that had, instead of letting him and Greg through, left them and their trolleys upturned on the ground in between platforms 9 and 10. 

"Why can't we get through?" John hissed to Greg.

"I dunno--we're going to miss the train, I don't get it..." Greg whispered.

With their trolleys righted, the boys watched as the clock struck eleven.

"It's gone," Greg was a bit stunned. "The train's left. What if Mum and Dad can't get back through to us? Have you got any Muggle money?"

John snorted. "The Dursley's haven't given me pocket money in years. We should go wait by the car, we're attracting too much--"

"The car!"

"What?"

"We can fly the car to Hogwarts!"

"But, aren't we--"

"Even underage wizards are allowed to use magic if it's a real emergency, there's a section something in the Restriction of Whatever that--"

"Can you fly it?"

"No problem!"

 _Famous last words_ , John thought as they landed in the only tree on the grounds that could fight back. Greg's wand had snapped, holding together by a few splinters, and John decided it was very clear Hedwig would be avoiding him for a long while. 

Between missing the train, crashing the car, the attacking tree, Greg's broken wand, and Hedwig's obvious anger, John and Greg had thought they'd exhausted several weeks worth of bad luck. As Snape led them to his office, they realized they had never been more wrong.

"So, the train isn't good enough for the famous John Watson and his faithful sidekick Lestrade. Wanted to arrive with a _bang_ , did we, boys?"

Both of them were completely gobsmacked not to be expelled. So was Mycroft.

"There you are, where have you _been_? The most _absurd_ rumors--oh good lord, you _flew the damn car_!"

"How the _hell_ do you do that?"

"For what it's worth, we haven't been expelled--"

"I cannot _believe_ the pair of you--"

"Merlin, Myc, we just got out with McGonagall, Dumbledore, _and_ Snape! Spare us the lecture and tell us the password!"

**Author's Note:**

> Fun bit to write. :)


End file.
